Recovery

So here I am, jobless again. Six days after the bomb was dropped on me. I can't say it's been the best week of my life. I've lost jobs before, but on top of losing the income and benefits, I've lost my free tuition for my Masters program. It really feels like I failed, like I blew a great opportunity.

Was I surprised? I knew I would be expendable if any of us got let go. But the timing...that's what disgusts me. I was on a three month action plan for improving my processing accuracy. What is really low on the company's part is that they promised me three months. I got 2.5. I had my best month eve in February with 95 percent. Well above the company standard. In March, I did slip to 90. My mentor and confidant quitting was a tough blow. I would go to him if I had any tough questions, and when he left, that void was hard to fill. April didn't start off great, but I was getting better. By the second week of the month, I had figured out new ways to concentrate and focus. Red Bull was part of it. In my last seven working days, I made one error. I was up to 93 percent and the only reason it wasn't higher is because we had so few files to work. My confidence was soaring.

Tuesday morning, I told my manager that I wish we had more files because I was doing so well. He laughed in agreement, acting like he understood. Three hours later, he calls me into a conference room. He gives me the bullshit about based on my totality, my employment at Kaplan is terminated. Nothing in writing, no package, nothing.I was walked back to my desk where I was allowed to gather a few possessions. My manager was watching me the whole time like he was a damn prison guard watching a prisoner who's heading straight to the chair. I grabbed my books, water bottle, a phone charger, one or two other things, and walked away without saying goodbye to a soul. I went into the break room to find my lunch inside the overly crammed refrigerator. Couldn't find it. I turned around and he is still watching me. I said "Screw it" and walked away into the elevator. He joined me in. I couldn't look at him. I really don't think it was his choice, I think it came from the scumbag working above him. I walked towards the revolving door for the last time. He quietly said "Good luck to you." I still couldn't look. I offered my hand for a weak handshake and that was it. A 15 minute walk to Ogilvie, an hour train ride to West Chicago, and a 30-minute drive to Willow Creek Church where I cried my eyes out with one of the care pastors in the Care Center.

Let's recap. I've lost my job, my income, my insurance, my benefits, and maybe worst of all, my free Masters tuition. That scumbag I mentioned can feel free to give me $20,000 to cover my tuition anytime.

As I said earlier, this feels like the worst failure of my life. I know the job did not suit my set of skills. It was analytical to an extreme level. I did verification for six months in 2006 with CEC. I hated it then. But this time, it was all I did. Looking back, when I was offered the position at Kaplan, maybe I should have taken the phone job instead. As much as I would have hated it, I don't doubt I would have lasted.

So, time to move on. I have a hell of a lot of time on my hands. I'm going to lose a lot of money. It's a blow to my pride. Hopefully, it will be a blessing in disguise. I really don't know. I wish I could have gotten a  full time job in writing or editing, but that's nearly impossible nowadays. So I tried to make myself more marketable with the financial aid. And hopefully, school will do that even more. In fact, I know it will. It's not like I'm being kicked out. As bad as their graduation rate is, they need me!

I have friends who care about me and I know will support me. I know God won't forsake me. I just hope wherever I go from here is something I enjoy, something I can succeed in, and will allow me to make a respectable living. I don't think that's asking too damn much.

Five things I'm digging

1) Tony Evans sermon titled "Who You Know" http://youtu.be/Y0YWXhM2vSA My Mom has only worked for American Airlines for forty years, so it holds a special place for me.

2) Red Bull at work.

3) Growing a beard again, first time I've been able to in two years.

4) Retiring my winter jacket for the next five months.

5) Getting a brand new car tomorrow! A 2014 Honda civic.

What just happened?

Just another Saturday night... Dave and Busters, buzz words, slowest service ever, two orders of sweet potato fries, getting my ass kicked at shuffleboard, drive to Chicago at 2 am and vine right bank, sitting in car at Jewel Osco parking lot, 30 minutes of sleep, drive home at 5 a.m. At least I shared it with someone.

My Mets video

I'm really proud I was able to participate in this. I got a quite a bit of face time too! Let's Go Mets!

Warrior

I don't write about wrestling on this blog much, unless it has to do with one an upcoming Ring of Honor show that I'm attending. But considering the magnitude of Wrestle Mania weekend and the wave of emotions that has circulated through wrestling fans all over the world, I cannot keep quiet.

I purchased WWE network, in large part so I would have access to all WEE PPV's for $10 per month. WrestleMania 30 was included so I was quick to jump on that. One of the best features of the network is that they were going to broadcast the WWE Hall of Fame ceremony in full. I had been waiting for this to happen for years. The list of 2014 inductees was impressive" Paul Bearer, Carlos Colon, Lita, Razor Ramon, Mr. T, Jake "the Snake" Roberts, and the headliner, the Ultimate Warrior.

I was getting into wrestling right around the time that Warrior burst onto the scene. I had never seen anything like him. The painted face, the arm tassels, the log hair flying as he sprinted down the aisle towards the ring. He'd climb up on the apron, and violently shake the ropes up and down. I think this was to catch his breath after the running. The basic warrior match always ended the same way...clothesline, clothesline, flying tackle, overhead press slam, splash, 1-2-3. He certainly wasn't the best wrestler, but his energy caught the attention of kids like me. 

He then captured my attention a year after his arrival. I remember watching Summer Slam 88 when he dethroned the Honky Tonk Man in under one minute in Madison Square Garden to become the Intercontinental champion. A year and a half later, I watched WrestleMania 6 with my father and best friend at the time. We went to Dad's apartment and ordered fried chicken. The city was Toronto, Canada with 68,000 people in attendance. It was title for title, Ultimate Warrior vs. Hulk Hogan. No one knew who would win. I remember when Warrior won the match, I couldn't believe Hogan had gotten beat. And I felt like the torch had been passed and Warrior was now face of the company.

I remember my heartbreak when Sgt. Slaughter won the title from him. I remember the surrealness when Jake Roberts locked him in a coffin and had his cobra bite him. I remember my interest dissipating when he left the company after holding the company up for more money before a match. I remember random feuds with Jerry Lawler, Goldust, and Triple H. I remember cringing at his reign in WCW. That follow-up match with Hulk Hogan at Halloween Havoc is easily one of the five worst matches I have ever seen. His loud promos that once thought were so cool now seemed non-sensical, random, and just confusing.

He legally changed his name to Warrior in 1996. He left WWE after 1996 and many thought he wouldn't go back. He had his principles, he had his values, and wouldn't be swayed. His peers resented him for being greedy, unprofessional, and selfish.

On April 5, he was inducted to the WWE Hall of Fame. It just felt right. He belongs there. I watched as his young daughters walked out on stage with him as he prepared to give his speech. His wife was crying in the front row. On April 6, he appeared at WrestleMania with the other inductees on stage in the Superdome. On April 7, he appeared on Raw for the first time in 18 years. He gave a speech.

No WWE talent becomes a legend on their own. Every man's heart one day beats its final beat. His lungs breathe their final breath. And if what that man did in his life makes the blood pulse through the body of others and makes them believe deeper in something larger than life then his essence, his spirit, will be immortalized. By the story tellers, by the loyalty, by the memory of those who honor him and make the running the man did live forever. You, you, you, you, you, you are the legend makers of Ultimate Warrior. In the back I see many potential legends. Some of them with warrior spirits. And you will do the same for them. You will decide if they lived with the passion and intensity. So much so that you will tell your stories and you will make them legends, as well. I am Ultimate Warrior. You are the Ultimate Warrior fans. And the spirit of the Ultimate Warrior will run forever!

On April 8, less than 24 hours later, he died.

It's almost as if he knew. It felt like he was giving his own eulogy. The one good thing is he made peace with WWE and his fans got to see him have one last hurrah. We as fans lost an icon. But his wife has been widowed. His daughters lost their dad. I didn't agree with everything he believed in. But I respect him for not giving in to society or the popular trends and instead standing up for what he believed in.

When your idol insults you publicly

I really never thought something like this would happen. Thursday was one of the craziest days of my life. I woke up at 3 am to fly to New York City. I finally met a friend I had been communicating with for six months on social media. The wait was worth it. Then I went to the Mets-Nationals game with my father. After the Mets got thoroughly trashed, I took the Q48 bus back to LaGuardia Airport. I was listed for the 6 pm flight and even thought the evening flights looked tight, I was confident I would get one of them. After all, there were three more flights after the 6 pm and 150 passengers were going on each one.

But little did I ever expect what would happen to me in the security line. I was maybe eight people back in the security line. All of a sudden, Joe Benigno from WFAN sports radio in New York walks into the line. I couldn't believe it. My favorite radio host in the world! I had met him twice already, but this was the first time where he showed up and it was totally unexpected for me. BTW, it took him forever to get through security! Three pill bottles, tons of media passes, two coats. It was kind of funny!

Once we got through the security line and getting our stuff together, I asked where he was going. He said Dallas for the Final Four. I tried to engage him in some sports talk and he was answering in short sentences, but he seemed willing to converse with me. We walked towards the gates, and I met his co-host Evan Roberts for the first time. We talked a little about the Mets, some other sports stuff, and Texas. They were kind enough to take photos with me.

After maybe 15 minutes, I left them. Before long, I realized that every Chicago flight was delayed. It was around 5:30 and the next Chicago flight wasn't leaving till 7. I didn't want to think about that, so I went back to chat with Joe and Evan for a few minutes. I knew their flight was leaving at six. Maybe I should not have gone back. I didn't do much talking, I just hung bear them for a bit. Being around those delayed flights, not knowing if I was getting home, was tough. I guess I wanted a distraction. They left around 5:50 and I thanked them for having a great show and entertaining me every weekday from 9-12 Central time. As for me, I got the last direct Chicago flight home. Everything seemed cool.

12 hours later, I'm at work, processing financial aid files. Joe and Evan go on the air. And the first thing Joe does is talk about the horrible travel. He mentions the "obnoxious Mets fan in a Matt Harvey jersey who was up his rear end". Considering Joe's problem with Harvey, that jersey may have been an issue too! Joe also said Evan did a great job getting rid of me which was not true, since I walked away on my own. But I'm listening to this rant and I swear it's a dream. I couldn't even move. For him to get on me like that after the fact is only inappropriate, it's disrespecful and it's disgusting. I thought I had been very respectful and appreciative. If he and Evan had something to do, I would have walked away sooner. I never got that impression whatsoever. And I pity him that he decided to go the backbiting route. It shows me what a coward he really is. Yet, I'm kind of flattered that he remembered me so well that he felt compelled to insult me 12 hours later.

Maybe it was because he hates flying. He had the nerve to then say how brutal it was that he couldn't get peanuts in coach, and they were serving  filet mignon in first class in front of him! Since he clearly hates flying., maybe I just caught him at the wrong time. The fact is I'd met him twice before this and he was cool then.

I tweeted Evan expressing my disappointment in Joe for taking cheap shots at me. Of course, he hasn't responded and I'm sure he won't. How do I feel now? Well, it's been 15 hours and I still really don't believe what happened Don;t get me wrong, I still love their show. That doesn't change. But Joe Benigno once said he became successful in sports radio because he never stopped being a fan. Apparently, he has forgotten what it's like to be a fan. Because he clearly doesn't care about them. I have lost a lot of respect for him as a man.

Bank of America Shamrock Shuffle recap

After two months of training, 3/30 was the day for my first 8k race. I woke up at 5 am on a Sunday, which is usually the time I get up during the week for work. I wolfed down a oatmeal raisin power bar, a banana, and a liter of water. For clothes, I wore my new black thermal headband (which covered my entire forehead and kept my ears warm), black mesh shorts, a mesh black long sleeve t-shirt, and over that, my green sleeveless "Play Like a Jet" shirt. I grabbed my Mets hoodie and drove to the Bartlett train station.

I was pretty surprised that 20 people were waiting to board the same train I was. It was still pretty cold outside, close to 30 degrees, nothing like the 60 degrees. I had seen in the forecast. So I was sitting down and this cute redhead walks by me and says hello. I must have been half asleep because I just said hi and didn't think twice about it. Two days later, I found out it was a girl I'd met on Valentine's Day and hadn't seen since. I was wondering when I was going to see her again; I guess God does have a sense of humor!

So I arrived at Union Station around 7:15. There were no buses going east to Grant Park so I walked the one mile down Jackson Street to the red gear check in station. The sun was starting to come out so I decided to shed the hoodie. I stretched for maybe ten minutes and drank two small cups of water and lemon-lime Gatorade. Around 8:10, I headed to Start Corrale A, which was the second group to begin, behind the Elite runners. We were all packed in really tight. I stood in place for maybe 20 minutes, just counting down the minutes. I kept trying to move around to stay loose. Mentally, I felt pretty ready, but it was still something I had never done before. After the National Anthem, we were ready to go.

My goal was to complete the 4.97 mile course i under 40 minutes. In the first mile, a lot of runners passed me, but I was just trying to keep a good pace. I did not want to wear myself out early. My big concern was I couldn't breather through my nose after the first half mile. Maybe I should have worn a Breathe Right strip. The first two miles went pretty quickly, but going from 2 to 3 seemed to take a little longer. I ran all three of those miles in about 7:30 each, so I felt good about my pace. Between 3 and 4, I was keeping my pace, but my legs started to get heavy. I needed to see that 4 mile sign. I had to know when there was one mile left. On Michigan Ave, I saw it and I felt that little extra life kicking in. At that moment, I was playing Metalingus, an Alter Bridge song, which was also Edge's theme music in WWE. Then, I played songs from Rocky, which always gives me an extra gear. I made a left on Michigan and went uphill  and then downhill over a bridge. Then, I made one last left turn, taking me into the southern entrance of Grant Park. I could see the finish line about a half mile out.

With Gonna Fly Now playing at near full volume, I had to find one last charge. I had kept my pace the whole race, but I hadn't sprinted. After running at that pace for about ten seconds, I knew it was time to turn it on. I let out a primal scream and took towards the finish. It seemed so far way, but I knew every step would get me closer. Finally, I crossed that finish mat and I nearly collapsed. I could walk, but my legs didn't want to move. I ate a banana and drank a bottle of water as I slowly paced down Columbus St.

I picked up my gear, had my picture taken, and I went into the post-ace party. I redeemed my ticket for my free Michelob Ultra beer and drank while I stood on line waiting for a massage. Both of them hit the spot! My left calf was strained and my right Achilles felt tight. Other than that, I was okay. I also grabbed a cheeseburger and drank another beer before heading back down Jackson. there were other people I knew running the race, but I had no idea where they were. So I just grabbed the 12:30 train and went home. That hot shower felt so good!

My final time was 35:01, which put me around 1,260 out over over 40,000 participants. Not bad at all.