It really is both amazing me and scaring me how many people I know are getting engaged, married, and having kids. There are so many times I see a girl is hooked up with a guy and all I can think to myself is "How the hell did he manage to snag her?" And then, I inevitable ask myself the same damn question. "What's wrong with me?!"
I know it's a dangerous question and one that I should not be asking myself. However, I can't help think what was wrong with me compared to this other fellow. No, this not a soliloquy about a desire to get married, or have a family. I don't need that to be fulfilled. And it's not fair to ask any other person to fulfill you and meet all those unmet needs and to clean your crap up.
The thing is I feel really conflicted. Some days, I tell myself that I'm not going to think about dating for a long time. Yet I can't deny that I'd like to date and then settle down with the right one. And God knows I'm not getting any younger, my physical peak is probably behind me. But I've come to this conclusion. I suck at chasing and pursuing women I'm interested in. I've never even had Date 1 with a woman who I've chased. The connection, and I use that word loosely, just is there; it can't be manufactured. That said, what is the deal with women when they are single? They say they want men to pursue them and be open about how they feel. Then, when we do pursue, we immediately get shot down. Maybe, most of them just have their eye on one guy and are waiting for him, while the rest of us just get to hope for a chance, but that hope is all in vain. The few women who may have looked at me that way, well, I settled for them because I had no other prospects. At least I didn't marry any of them!
And I have been rejected so many times, that I may as well be the reject king. And women have these rehearsed lines that they pull out and use on us guys. Every woman who looks halfway decent or has something close to a personality has a full arsenal of reject lines. Guys, we know the lines. Here are a few of my favorites, along with the translations of what they really mean:
1) "I appreciate you asking me, but..." (I wish you hadn't opened your mouth.) This was used on me by a girl I have liked for years. When I finally had the nerve to do something about it, this is what I got.
2) "My life is too complicated." (There are too many other guys spending their money on me and there ain't no room for you in the schedule, bub.)
3) "I have a boyfriend." (My cat and pints of Ben and Jerry's.)
4) "I'm focusing on my career." (My boring 8 hours per day with my annoying co-workers and jerk of a boss is still better than dating you.)
5) "I'm not interested in dating right now" (The right guy just hasn't come along for her yet.)
6) Probably the most usual deal now is not responding to texts and calls anymore. (Get out of my life!)
Oh and I'm typing this six hours before I have my second speed dating event tonight! Who knows if something might actually happen.
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