Well, in my opinion, when a man knows a woman has made up her mind to leave him, but she hasn't told him yet, that may be the most helpless feeling of all. It isn't what she says, it's that she isn't saying anything.
Her answers become shorter, but even more than that, they become repetitive. Chats have become "Nice" or "Thank you." And I say this so much, but in the least 3 weeks, I've been the only to initiate contact. There was one exception, she messaged me to inform she had tested positive for COVID. Other than that, she seems all but disengaged from a relationship.
I have to borrow lyrics from Blackhawk. Every day I brace myself to hear the words I'm scared she's going to say. And every night I thank the Lord somehow I dodged the bullet one more day.
I do a great job at wearing out my welcome, and once again, I couldn't get past 2 months. Actually this lasted 1. Hell, maybe I'm disengaging already, so when she says to me what she is ultimately going to, it won't hurt me as bad.
I'll see her next Saturday at the chili cookoff. I'm sure we'll hug, it's been a month since we've seen each other. But it won't be the same. It never will. I lost my temper, I became embarrassed, I retreated, and I ruined it.
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