In the last two or three days, I feel like I've done a lot of both. I have been an encourager, a mercy-giver, and began healing what was a broken friendship.On the other hand, I have become angry, embarrassed, and dealt with hatred from so many people.
The hatred is pretty much all coming from people from the wonderful country of Canada. The way the American women choked away that Olympic gold medal game today was terrible. A 2-0 lead with six minutes and they lose in overtime. I mean, this collapse ranks right up there with the 2012 Ryder Cup. The bottom line is I'm tired of seeing my country lose in hockey to our arch-rival. Now I got mad and I put it on Twitter. Didn't swear, like some would. Didn't call anyone names, like some would. I just expressed my outrage at losing again. OK, I may have mentioned how Canada relies on the US for all its economic support and without us, they'd be screwed. I think I got about 80 or 90 tweets from people I've never met questioning my character. I am not proud of some of the things I wrote in the moment. But for total strangers have the gall to call out my character and my faith and insult me...it flatters me. They would actually take the time and thought to tweet me in anger. It's like they assume I'm always a bad person. And I find myself feeling grateful. I'm grateful that there are people who truly know me and that they like me.
I hold my ground that this was an embarrassing loss for America and that the women's hockey team choked. I hate go to this, but I will. If this was the men who blew this game, would so many people be as easy to shake the loss off? Well, I am not. These women should be held to the same standard, if not a higher standard, as the men. USA and Canada are clearly the two best women's hockey teams in the world. But the USA has lost to Canada four straight times and has not won a gold medal in almost 20 years. When will it end?! Anyway, I'm not still mad about the loss. Hopefully, the men will redeem us tomorrow in the semi-finals. Regardless, I will not tweet about it. I think I will take a break from it for a few days, hopefully all this crap will blow over.
Despite what I said earlier, I have to admit this. I'm worried people I see regularly in social circles don't like me. Or maybe a better way to put it is maybe they don't get me. I don't want the whole world to like me; I am more than content with standing out. I will not cater to what American pop culture tells me is right or wrong.
But I wonder if I'm travelling alone. There is something I'm learning about people. People require perfection. So few people forgive nowadays. They see one sign of bad in someone and they run away. And I'm especially talking about romantic relationships. It's what I have experienced over and over again. I have to be so worried about saying everything just right and doing everything just right. It's like if I make one wrong move or get angry once, I get my butt kicked to the curb. Well, I hope those ladies have a nice group of perfect friends they can cling to. On that note, thanks to KC for breaking off our April date today. There's nothing else that could have caused it except one post on social media about that game. I guess I wasn't "good" enough, was I? This is the kind of heartbreak I have dealt with since high school. I'm 33 now.
My name is Adam. I've never pretended to be perfect. I have a temper at times and I worry about certain things. But I'm real, I'm loyal, I'm honest, I'm fun, and I'm hard-working. I'm a work in progress. I always will be until the Lord calls me home. And if people can't accept me as that, then I don't want anything to do with them.
I believe in God. I believe in second chances. But more than that, through these successes and failures, these tears and laughter, and these gains and losses, I am learning to believe in myself. I hope this will make it easier for me to inject just a little bit of good into this sorry, dark, broken world.
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