Retreat recap

Around 12 pm, I'm on my lunch break at work and realize I left my sleeping bag at home. Now I'm supposed to be in Wheaton at 5:45 to drive in the car pool. From Hoffman Estates in rush hour traffic, I figure it will take 45 minutes and I leave at 5 p.m. So I call my mother and she agrees to meet me in Winfield so I can pick it up. We make the exchange and I hurry over to Wheaton and arrive at 5:43.

Of course, only about 12 people showed up and we had a plethora of drivers with keys dangling in hand, ready to drive to Lake Geneva. So I went with Jason and Allison (friends of mine who are married and expecting their first baby in a couple of months.

After hitting Jimmy John's (Had an Italian Night Club) for dinner we got to the conference center around 8:15. I was one of the first non-leaders there. Ted and Melissa were there as were McElwee and his family. I was a little bummed the dogs couldn't come along. Then again, we were staying in the nicest building on the property (Maples) so that may have been a factor. In this building, the downstairs is one big room with a piano, ping pong table, fussball, the camp's snack bar, a couple of couches. A narrow hallway leads to four bedrooms, one of which is for handicapped people. The girls stayed upstairs.

About 30 people came. After some prayer and worship, we played a few team-building games. Including that brutal one where you have to build a house of cards. I had never done this. And I don't plan on doing it again either. Then we had some prayer and worship time and then we played Mafia for a while. I was the last person eliminated before the game ended. McElwee, usually the mayor, does these long stories when a player gets killed off. As soon as he said the words "New York Mets," I did like Kramer in the Seinfeld episode with the masturbation contest. I stood right up and said "I'm out!" and walked away.

I spent a lot of time playing ping pong and I really got better as the weekend went on. One of the games we played was around the world where the players surround the table. One player hits the ball, another returns it and everyone keeps walking or running around the table and takes their turn to hit and receive. It gets crazy when you get down to three players because you're sprinting trying to get to the ball. Then in the finals you play to 3 points. We hit the ball, put the paddle down on the table, spun around, picked the paddle up and hit the ball again. Even I got dizzy. The room felt like it was spinning, a little twinge in my head, the whole thing. But I won quite a few times. It was fun playing again.

I knew all but 4 or 5 people on the group. One girl I remember meeting was Megan. She's of Chinese descent and from British Columbia. She plays piano, teaches math (though she's in grad school at Wheaton now), and has a cool easy-going personality. She's been going to Ecclesia for only a month or two. But here's what I remember more than anything. The group is sitting in a circle on Saturday and our meeting is about to begin. I noticed she wasn't at breakfast or in the room. Someone mentioned she had gone running. She ran 13 miles and got lost! Someone drove her back to camp and when she came back, she looked like she hadn't even broken a sweat. Man, I hate people like that!

Anyway, we all spent 6 or 7 hours on Saturday in solitude. Like last year, I wound up sleeping most of those hours. I needed the rest, but I was having a little trouble concentrating too. I found myself asking a lot of very basic questions about God, faith, life, purpose, and things like that. I came away with more questions than answers, truth be told. Not that I'm fighting doubt, but more of wondering about myself, where I fit in the world, what my mission in life is, how to deal with problems. At least I came away from the time feeling relaxed, but a little frustrated too. I tried writing about it in my notebook, but didn't know how to start. So I kind of withdrew for most of Saturday night. I still played ping pong later that night, but declined to play more Mafia.

Around 8:30 pm, we all took a hay ride on two tractors through the campgrounds. Then we started gathering hay and throwing it at the other tractor. It got a little wild, but it got serious when my friend Bill lost his wedding ring in the process. One day before his anniversary, no less. We went back to search for it the next morning, but amongst fallen leaves and hay, it's hard to find a solid gold ring. So we're all pitching in to buy a new ring. Sunday morning was a quick wrap up time and we left around 10:30.

Here's my feeling right now. I was hoping I would work on some of my personal issues that I'm fighting and I don't think I developed a plan or anything like that. But maybe it was a productive weekend. Maybe I learned something and I just don't realize it yet. And I know I missed Ring of Honor, but hey, at least I can get the DVD.